in the weeds

PART 1

Oh Spring: the time of year when weeds are under siege because of our unquestioned pursuit of turf. You know lawns are problematic, right? They require tremendous amounts of time, energy and resources, poison water, air and soil but provide zero benefit to any living creature.

What does it mean we’re willing to destroy the worthwhile, like dandelions, and assert the useless even dangerous instead? Why replace plants that provide multiple benefits with the illusion of a ‘healthy’ green lawn?

Why risk so much for illusion?

Maybe perfectly manicured lawns manifest the illusions we wish for ourselves: my life is problem free and under my control. Illusions though require constant maintenance. Our resources depleted by what we’ve been conditioned to want, rather than directed toward seeking what we need.

I need broadleaf plantain because it soothes insect bites. The omega-3 fatty acids in purslane lower my cholesterol. Yarrow is my go-to antiseptic. Not only do weeds provide myriad benefits for humans, they are food for insects and essential for soil health.

In the same way these common lawn ‘eyesores’ provide physical nourishment, difficult experiences nourish my humanity. 

Out with friends recently, an oversight caused me to shut down. My reaction, disproportionate to the incident, caused awkwardness. I felt embarrassed because I had been a pouty bitch. Like chickweed, it would be easier to remove the ugly event from my mental and emotional landscape. 

Instead I am sitting with it.

Despite how mortifying my behavior was, I am curious. What does this incident have to tell me? Why did it spark such an intense reaction? What can I learn from it? Flaws, failures and the fearsome are as useful as the weeds in my yard. 

I’m not saying this is easy. Lawns and their sidekick, landscaping, give us the illusion of control: I determine what grows where for my sanctioned aesthetic purpose. And it’s easier to reach for the human varieties of permethrin: busyness, addiction, approval, shopping or work (to name a few) to distract from what we deem ugly and bad. Besides, most of us know how to utilize distressing experiences about as well as we know how to make a salve out of weeds.

What if instead we approach the troubling things that pop up in our lives with curiosity rather WMDs? What if we expend time, energy and resources benefiting from rather than denying them? 

They speak a deep medicine we need.